I'm Rockinsticks and this is Weekend Report.  In our top story Headmistress Needlesnswiffers proved herself a tease this week when she revealed that there is a 25% chance she will in fact be joining the great house of Slytherin next term.  Slytherins ran about the common room giddy and cleaning up in hopes that the Hat would determine their common room worthy.  One errant crafter was quoted as saying, "Yeah, I heard the Head of House even imported special exotic kind of hotties just for the Headmistress."  So we all wait with bated breath to find out if we will be the noble house of our heroic Headmistress.

Weather:  A brewing storm of NQFY's will be hovering overhead for the next few days.

In a related story - Sorting.  There are only four more days to present yourself for sorting so if you are a NQFY or a veteran Slytherin get thee to the ceremony.  The more ambitious snakes we have the better chance we have at victory.

Forgivable Curse of the Week:  Oh Basilisk Breath!

Over at the Sub-Human Interest desk we have.....we have....we have absolutely nothing to say.

Have a great week my sinuous pals and next week we'll only be one day from a new term.

This is Rockinsticks signing off.

I'm Rockinsticks and this is Weekend Report.  A mild sadness spread across the Snake Pit this week as Slytherin's learned that they did not bring home the House Cup.  With true Slyther-style the chicks of the dungeon got off the sofa du wallow and raised their glasses to a game well played and a pile of finished objects.

At some point in the evening several crafty witches cast their patronuses who joined the debauchery with spectacular ease.  Joseybug's Horse and Vox8's Elephant were later found collapsed in a corner.  Head of House, Girlywithatwist was seen the next day casting intricate anti-patronus wards on the liquor cabinet.

Weather:  Lazily drifting WIPS will glide across a brilliant break month blue sky this week.

In other news Abycat and Severus (who were strangely missing all night from the party) handed out hangover potion and began to circulate news of next term's plan for Slyther-Domination.  Yes, we will pick ourselves up with the Slytherin Quest Double OWL Dare.  Third years and above two OWLs....300 points...yessssss.  Young ins you can compete too with a single OWL.  So, lets start swatching.  The sooner your proposal is approved the sooner you can cast on for real.  Let's overwhelm our examiner on May 1 with a pile of proposals and a taste of what Slytherin is going to bring next term.

Forgivable Curse of the Week:  Patrounus Poop!

From the Sub-Human Interest Desk - the starting line.  What are you doing in these last couple of weeks to prepare for new classes on May 1st?  Are you sorting stash, swatching OWLs, cracking your knuckles in anticipation, obsessively checking for the sorting thread?

I've been sorting stash.  I am realizing that I could in all likelihood open a yarn store in my living room called The Single Skein.  I am only mildly embarrassed. 

So Slyther-on my wicked and wonderful friends.  May is on it's way.

I'm Rockinsticks and this is Weekend Report.  In our top story, fine literature.  There was a...ahem....rash this week of very private messages that lured Slytherin babes away from their knitting in an effort to educate themselves about what evil twins Abycat and Jjkawano, and their inappropriate sister Rockinsticks do when they are with Professor Snape.  Yarn baskets sat ignored and one hottie was quoted as saying, "Well, you know, its not like the knitting thing.  I don't mind being ignored for that, cuz ya know I get socks and...uh...warmers and stuff out of it, but this?  What can a guy expect when his Slytherin gal has had her head in the computer all day?"  The lovely DNAtheroy retorted, "Shhhh I'm reading."

Weather:  A high pressure of OWLish looking clouds will sweep through the Snake Pit this weekend.

In Sports today is the day to slither on out to the Quidditch pitch and post up some cheers.  A reminder - one cheer per snake worth 3 points so get out there and cheer for your house.  Even if your OWL or NEWT are biting you in the arse you have a bit of time to post a little ditty for Slytherin.

Forgivable Curse:  Single Plied Bison Belly!

Finally from the Sub-Human interest desk - Horcruxes.  In last month's Felix Felicis prize question on the main blog I posed the following question, "You find you are approaching your 39th birthday and decide this is as good a time as any to begin making Horcruxes.  What object would you choose and where would you hide it?"  I thought I'd pose it to the snake blog as well.  Mine would be my Slytherin green Chuck Taylor hightops because I've had them since college - thus indestructible and lets face it, the odor alone assures me no one would brave it.  Leave a comment and tell the world your weakness.

This is Rockinsticks signing off for the final Friday of the Winter Term.  Yes, I'll probably still do these weekend reports through April, because if nothing else it is a chance to test my post wine typing skills.  My seventh grade typing teacher that wouldn't let us use paper would be sooooo proud.

Greetings and SSSSSSSSSalutations I'm Rockinsticks and this is Weekend Report.  In our top story Head in a Fog.  Rockinsticks dropped the quaffle this week and forgot about weekend report so please enjoy these class themed libations.

Once again an age line has been cast around this post cross it and there isn't a Brazilian wax salon in the world that can save you. 

Oh and if you come up with any forgivable curses after your refreshments leave them in the comments.

Charms' Airhead

1 1/2 oz peach schnapps
fill with cranberry juice

Pour peach Schnapps into shot glass. Add chilled cranberry juice to fill.

DADA's Pink Lady (sounds appropriately nasty)

4 oz Vanilla Schnapps
4 oz cranberry juice
1 splash milk

Add ingredients to a cocktail shaker half-filled with ice cubes. Shake and strain into a parfait glass, and serve.

Potions' Wonderwoman Tea

sweet tea
lemon juice
2 vodka

Fill cup with ice.
Add 2 shots of vodka.
Add lemon juice to your discretion.
Fill remainder of the cup with Sweet Tea.

Herbology's Wildflower (this is either really good or nasty)

2 oz Fruit Punch Gatorade

2 oz V8 Splash Fruit Medley
3 oz Blended Frozen strawberries
2 oz Mountain Dew citrus soda
2 oz vodka
1 oz lemon juice

Freeze the gatorade and juice to a thick slush. Blend the frozen strawberries to a smooth texture with the thick slush mixture. Add Mountain Dew, Vodka and Lemon Juice. Serve with Strawberry and Lemon on the side.

History of Magic's Mudwrestle

2 oz coffee liqueur
2 oz vodka
2 oz creme de cacao
2 oz Bailey's Irish cream

Mix ingredients in a shaker. Serve in an ice-filled old-fashioned glass.

Arithmancy's Lucky Seven (pretty sure you'd only be able to count to seven after)

1/2 oz  vodka
1/2 oz amaretto almond liqueur
1/2 oz triple sec
1/2 oz  rum
1/2 oz Jack Daniel's

1/2 oz  peach liqueur
1/2 oz sloe gin
1 splash cranberry juice
1 splash lime juice
1 splash orange juice

Combine the seven liquors, straight, into a tall glass. Top it with three splashes of cranberry, lime, and orange juices.

Transfiguration's Dragon's Blood

3 oz club soda
3 oz  vodka
4 oz cinnamon schnapps

In a twelve ounce glass, mix all ingredients and serve.

Muggle Studies' Doctor

1 part fruit punch
1 part gin
1 part lemon juice

Mix it together and shake (not too hard). Pour it into an ordinary cocktail glass

Yar Weekend Report

Welcome to a special nautical edition of Weekend Report.  This week's top story - Snakepit Island.  In a bold move this week Slytherins climbed aboard Captin Maigret's pirate ship to find the island where the Malabrigo trees grow.  After having to turn the ship around once to procure enough coffee to keep our head of house calm the ship sped through the seas.  One Slytherin was quoted as saying, "Nothing like a long sea voyage to get some serious work done on your OWL." 

Weather:  Snakepit Island expects another beautiful clear day with random storms of margarita mix and sunscreen massages.

In other news Classwork is slowly rolling in:

Herbology - 7 bounteous bouquets

Transfiguration - 4 pints of dragons blood turned in.

Potions - 8 super strong chicks

HOM - 6 goals whoo hoo

Muggle Studies - 8 healing draughts

Arithmancy - 5 circular wonders

DADA - 7 educational decrees

Charms - 5 wisps of wonder

Keep up the classwork Snakes, I know we're all stressing out on the OWLs, but we're in third place so lets rock it.

Forgivable Curse of the Week:  You can kiss my mohair covered pointy bits.

Finally from the Subhuman interest desk - Crafting Books.  You know you collect them, covet them and guard them as though they were horcruxes.  So, you are boarding the pirate ship for Snakepit Island and can only bring two knitting books which ones would they be?  I'd bring Elizabeth Zimmerman's Knitter's Almanac and one of Barbara Walker's stitch bibles.  What about you?  Leave a comment and give me something entertaining to read.

This is Rockinsticks on the high seas signing off and saying, "Yar, I like rum."

Welcome to another edition of Weekend Report.  I'm Rockinsticks with co-anchor Elfliberator.  In our top story this week there was an unconfirmed breakout of cookies and cooties in the common room this week.  It is uncertain where the outbreak began, but it is believed to be related to missing your post quota if your name is Drusillawormwood.  Slytherins are advised to post one absurd fact a day in order to remain cootie free.

In other news the point spread is tight for the house cup with Ravenclaw in first place.  We're close snakes keep up the crafting.  If you are worried about your OWL look for little projects for classes.  Remember everything gets at least 15 points.

Weather:  Single-ply like temperatures should be enjoyed by all.

In sports the big Dateline Challenge runs March 11 - 14th.  Should you choose to don your shin guards you will be matched up in a sudden death match with someone from another house crafting similar things for charity.  Fill out this form to be matched up.

On the injured list or simply (like me) usually chosen last for sports?  Brush up your cheers for the House Pride Exhibition on the 25th.  No crafting required just big hurrahs.  If you weren't part of the cheering madness last term scan through this thread starting here for the excellent cheers from Fall 2010.  Each cheer represents 3 points for Slytherin.

Forgivable Curse of the Week:  You are the missed yarn over in the Eastonian shawl of my life.

Finally from the Sub-human interest desk - toys.  All this talk of cooties got me reminiscing about the toys of my youth.  All time favorite...Tinkertoys.  So stroll down memory lane and leave a comment telling us your favorite childhood toy.  Yes, you will date yourself.  No I don't care.

Have a great weekend snakes.  This is Rockinsticks signing off.